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If you have been in the dating world for awhile or
really just paying attention to those dating around you,
you have likely noticed a universal phenomenon — “bad
boys” and “good girls” seem to naturally attract each
other. This kind of relationship may well be the most
self destructive type there can be for any number of
different reasons.
A common misperception is that the bad boy — a guy
with an obvious wild side — is somehow manipulating
the “good girl” and creating a fictional (therefore,
attractive) dating relationship. In reality, in the vast
majority of cases, the girl actively seeks out her “bad
boy” counterpart. Unless she stops to think about WHY
she chases after this kind of guy, often she may be
unaware of this need to be in a relationship with
someone with a different personality than herself.
Here are 4 major reasons why a so called “good girl”
may want to jump into a relationship with a “bad boy”:
1. She wants to fix him
Many women come from a family where their father
was unavailable to them emotionally. This could be
from a divorce that kept the young girl and her father
apart or because a father who was present physically
was not really there emotionally for the child. In this
situation the women attempts to recreate the same
distant relationship in her own life in an attempt to “fix”
the emotional distance this time around.
2. She wants someone familiar
Everyone is attracted to personality types that are
familiar, even if they are not positive types. This
means women who have a father who was a “bad boy”
and perhaps a disaster as a husband is going to be
attracted to the exact same emotional traits and
characteristics in their own partners.
3. She wants something TOTALLY new
For some women choosing a guy who is a complete
opposite and offers a change of pace, new adventure
and even a bit of controlled risk is a big attractor.
However, women often fail to understand that the risk
taking isn’t something that is carefully thought out and,
with time, the risk will increase and the adventure will
become more and more stressful and destructive.
4. She wants to SAVE him
The last issue that drives many “good girls” to enter
into relationships with guys who are on the wild side is
the drive to rescue or to salvage what she may see as a
troubled soul. In reality changing a personality is
impossible unless the other person recognizes the issue
and genuinely wants to make a change to keep the
relationship healthy.
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